dont know why

I've been thinking alot lately.. not about anything specific i must say but i have been thinking alot.. i feel like im wriggling in my skin to do something wanting to burst out and be sucked up into a vortex of creativity but it aint happening.. all i find is me getting mor frustrated and getting less hours in a day to do things..

but ANYWAY you see me all the time now so i dont really have anything as such to report.. yes i do lead a rather boring existence thank you for thinking that :P
although last night Sez and i went to the Behind Crimson Eyes concert and it was really good i enjoyed myself alot and i hope sez did too!!

i dont know if anyone will even read this, i guess it doesnt matter if anyone does or doesnt.. its just a silly little thing which i never write on anyway.. so i guess its almost somewhat pointless.. I didnt know whether i should start the religion again or not, i guess i probably wont unless people want me too, i mean its all good and fun but is there really any point to it? or is it just me making my self out ot be something more important then what i am??!! i dont know..
hmm now i guess im starting to whine but hey guess what its my blog so i can if i want.. and i have to let it out somehow otherwise ill do something stupid and ill regret it and then ill feel stupider so ill do it again and then it becomes a vicious and ugly circle of regret and stupidity..

i think we all need a break just to get away either spend it with friends or alone just time to get out of the concrete walls just fucking break free and move on with shit for a change.. dont you ever get that suffocating feeling when your in a room, its not claustrophobia but more knowing that you have so many pressures pushing on you and that the walls around you are just echoing your screaming mind?? maybe not.. but thats how i feel sometimes when im in a room pathetic maybe but i guess im just not meant to be locked in a room give me a park anyday i love the openness and the freshness and the relaxation.. yes how hippy of me but its true its better then being in a cramped room with dull lighting and solid walls..

maybe im just tired and in a different place at the moment.. maybe i need to a break.. who knows, not long till its over i guess.. and everything will go back to being fine and rain will fall and itll be pleasant again..